Well last night was bad. I took Skittles into the emergency vet clinic just down the street to have her checked out, but by the time I got there I knew what had to be done. I had them put Skittles to sleep. It hurts so much to even type that out. Since her tooth extraction back in October, she hasn’t really been the same. She didn’t feel like playing anymore, she lost weight and slept more than usual and just declined from there.
Anyway, I called off work today and spent it crying, cleaning, watching comedies and listening to upbeat music to cheer me up, crying again, etc. I felt better after I exercised, but then as I was watching TV, I realized I had forgotten to throw away something Skittles used to use. I put it in a bag to be taken to the trash and I broke down again. I know that, in the end, I did the right thing, but my mind goes back to wondering if I should’ve played with her more. Then I realize that she had me wrapped around her paw and I feel better. So it’s been like that all day.
I want to post something else later about Skittles; listing the happy memories. I need to gather those thoughts together, though.